EGO TREACHERY

The internet was down all morning. So this might be a short blog or maybe not.

As we endeavor to become more enlightened; I started that sentence wrong. You cannot 'endeavor' to become enlightened. But, that is at the crux of the situation, I want to discuss. 

As you become more enlightened, you will attract more people to you, who are, also, on the path towards enlightenment. Light attracts light. However, until your ego has been successfully left behind, you incite it to clever means of sabotage. The ego represents darkness. Regardless of your spiritual convictions, know that both light and dark energy exist in the duality of this earth. If the ego can create negativity in the mind, it will attract negative energy to you.

Yesterday, I was afraid I had slighted some folks who did me an important favor. [I hadn't] I struggled with the idea in my mind without fully realizing that I was attacking myself. For some reason, I did not see the negativity of my thoughts. When I expressed this dilemma to my spouse, I interpreted her attempts to comfort me as refusal to understand what I was saying. I responded angrily and, of course, then ensued a pitch battle. My wife won't take any of my crap laying down. Good thing.

I, eventually, realized I was not being myself; but not, until I made a thorough ass of myself.

How it works, is that I was attacking myself for not being as good a person as I thought I should be. [I know it is pathetic]
The real problem is not being aware of what was going on, so I could nip it in the bud. By creating a negative mind state I attracted more negative energy to reinforce my original conclusions about myself. The ego will use an old program you have laying around in the basement of your mind; mine is the fear that people will abandon [or not understand] me and all the rage that goes with that. Once an old program gets triggered it generally plays itself out and it will be magnified by the negative energy you attracted to yourself.

I could have avoided this whole thing if I stopped my self criticism. I, also, could have curtailed it if I could have cued myself, that I was being nuts, when I felt the arising anger.

I have been taught that there is never an excuse for anger. I have learned, painfully, that that is true for me. If one can stop the second they feel anger on the horizon and realize they have made a mistake in their thinking, they will save themselves a lot of grief.

At every stage of our thinking love is a choice. When I was indulging in self criticism, I was rejecting love. We can be perpetually aware of what is going on in our minds and we can always choose love.

Fortunately, these old programs, that lay in the basement of our minds, gradually lose there influence if they are not dredged up. It is amazing that we would not listen to negativity from someone else and yet we will trash ourselves. Horrors!

So I give this advice to you and to myself. Love yourself, love yourself and love yourself some more. Always choose love.

Love and Peace,  Gregg