CRAZIER THAN A SEWING NEEDLE

Life can be weird. The Saturday before Easter it was Sunny and hot. I sat out most of the day in the Sun. It crossed my mind I might be overdoing it. I was fine Easter but Monday I began to feel washed out and drained of energy. [That began my mattress saga and sleep deprivation] I think I got a little Sun stroke. I have had that happen by being out in Sun too long before. I always recovered in a day. Of course I didn't have the sleep deprivation and I wasn't 84 years old.

I am getting better. It is disturbing because it seems to set me back in my recovery process. I have big dreams of being able to get up in the Morning and walk to the station store to get the paper. Every time I am on the verge of it something happens. Last time it was a snowstorm before that it was something else. I have had set-backs in my recovery before but I thought I was over them.

I have been practicing being in the moment and loving it. I got to the point where I could deal with ups and downs of my surroundings and stay loving and centered. Suddenly that is more difficult. I am not surprised because I had too easy a time reaching that space, I figured I had more learning to do.

I don't think there are any accidents. I think I needed to relapse a little to learn what I needed to learn. I was still carrying around a bunch of hidden judgements. I have whole lot of crap that I need to release before I can readily inhabit that unconditionally loving space. I am still crazier than that Sewing Needle on the end of your fishing pole. I don't know why that picture came into my mind. You know the bug called a Sewing Needle? It is like a small dragon fly and for some reason they like sitting on the end of your pole when you are out on the lake. I associate them mostly with my Grandfather. Like me, he had a lot of patience and he loved quiet. We could sit out for hours floating in a boat with the only excitement the Sewing Needles that would come sit on the end of our poles, they preened, some were green and some were golden colored.

Of course I am crazier than the Sewing Needles. They are part of the beauty of the universe. Oh, could I know my part and be that sane!

Well I have to make this blog short. I need to go to the grocery store and get some essentials. I will give you an update on my sanity Friday. I will be blogging early Friday as my afternoon is scheduled.

Love and Peace, Gregg