WHAT AILS ME

What I got caught up in, on Wednesday, was a doctors visit. Most of it was waiting but there was much more discussion than usual. I expected to arrive back home by three instead it was after four thirty. I was too weary to blog.

I have been feeling poorly for a couple weeks. Ever since my healing began in earnest in October I would have setbacks usually just at the point when I was thinking, “Boy, I am finally better!” After a week or so I would recover. The set backs included my total body. I would get out of breath easier. I would have a harder time getting in and out of my chair. I would have a harder time meditating. I would be more wobbly and be more concerned with falling. It is hard to describe but it is as if the neuro-muscular and cardiovascular systems were suddenly weakened.

I usually started to snap out of one of these setbacks in a few days. This time, no. So when I went to the doctor I was still in this funk. The blood test etc. gave plenty of explanation for what I was experiencing but did not pinpoint the problem. I did have a mild anemia with no easy explanation and a drop in my hemoglobin. These could be serious signs. He recommended I take some iron to see if it would pep me up. We explored the possibility of some kind of infection or internal bleeding and came up with nothing.

The doctor, of course, being an oncologist had to bring up the possibility of the cancer returning somewhere else in my body. There is no evidence of the esophageal tumor returning.

Everything that is happening at this moment could correct itself. We decided to wait one month and have the blood test again and if they are still off I will have to have scans completed. I will not wait a month if I don't feel better soon.

I don't know what this means for my future blogging. It sets back my announcement for my entry into the presidential race [just kidding- maybe]. I like all the candidates somewhat and some a great deal. What they have to go through to get to be president! I bet the ones with the greatest potential wouldn't consider it.

I thought I could do all my campaigning without leaving my study and I wouldn't spend a penny. I would begin to write some fiery blogs that folks could not resist passing on. I would portray myself as honestly as possible, warts and all. Lovable, of course. I would soon get the ear of The Media and it would come to me. I would not spend any effort or money on promotion. Other folks could take up the nitty gritty stuff of getting me on the ballot.

Well if I am likeable and knowledgeable enough it could be a sure thing. I could run the country from here too! Well one draw back, as long as we are still in this old age, I would have to dodge the assassins.

You can tell I must be sick allowing an ego dream to escape this mind.

I wish I lived at a place where I could raise some vegetables. Some of the mentors, I seek economic advice from, are seeing catastrophe ahead. You know and I know, we will be okay. We all have the capacity to love ourselves and others. I see love catching on everywhere. No matter what happens we will be able to take care of ourselves and our neighbors. I still would like to grub in the dirt and raise some vegetables.

HAPPY FRIDAY!

Love and Peace, Gregg