SURRENDER

Surrender. This word has a negative valence in our Western Culture. We run across the word frequently in spiritual literature from most sources. What does it mean? I don't pretend to have a clear answer, but bear with me, lets explore.

I am reminded of the last chapter in the Course in Miracles, where it states that at some point you will realize “you need do nothing.”

Does this mean that all the study and struggling is in vain? No, it means that all the struggle and study is something we do and at some point we realize we don't need to do it. Can we reach that surrender point without the study and struggling. I don't know and as long as we reside in separate bodies I may not know.

I do know I want to understand the concept better and, yes do it! Yes, I want to surrender to the moment. I want to be at that place where I know unconditional love. I want to experience oneness.

It is not like I haven't experienced it at all, but just through a peep hole. It reminds me of a time in my childhood. We were visiting our Grandparent's. It was cold. When we left, the windows of our 1935 Dodge were covered with thick frost. Instead of scrapping the windshield my Father scratched a slit on the outside frost and put his finger on the inside frost and melted a hole the size of his fingertip. He drove home peering through the hole. He only had to go a couple blocks. We lived close by. But that is a very small view of 'what is'.

So if I understand it correctly, surrendering is giving up the struggle to become and discovering we are already there. We are at the place we are trying to get to. We just need to realize it. We carry within us everything we need to know. We are love right now! We don't have to struggle and study. We just need to accept it.

We live in a soup. We have ego created morsels. Some personal. Some social. We have the mis-mash we call our consciousness, often a collection of silly beliefs and ideas. What part of the soup is real? Nothing that is fear tinged which the ego created morsels are. Certainly not the silly ideas and beliefs we have been hanging on to. So if we let all the silliness go what is left? That is 'what is'. We are spirits in bodies having an experience.

When we are in the moment we can feel the love welling up from inside us. We know that all is well.

Surrendering, surrendering..............does that mean we surrender to everything? Yesterday we had Thanksgiving at my daughter Laura's. I had two choking episodes created by my inability to swallow. I haven't had one in months. That is one of the symptoms of esophageal squamous cell cancer which I am recovering from. Does that mean the tumor is growing back? Or is it just scar tissue enhanced by the Jamison's I was throwing back to join the celebration? I don't know. I will know a week from today when my final PET scan is accomplished.

I can't live in the future and speculate on what decision I would make if it is growing back. I know I will make the correct decision for myself and my family.

But at this moment what do I need to surrender to? I surrender to 'what is'. I surrender to the reality of my present moment without the regret of the past or apprehension of the future. I am sitting here in a beam of unconditional love from a Universe that can do nothing but love. I am beginning to see Oneness through a bigger peep hole. I am a spirit inhabiting a vibrantly healthy body. All is well.

Love and Peace, Gregg