THE MALADY

207 PM and I have just began to put words up on the screen. I have been slow all Morning mostly from this malady that has had me in its grip for these last few weeks, but also from the heat. We are not used to it, up here in Minnesota land, we had a very cool Spring so far. Yesterday the heat roared in, I think our thermometer read 87F. It reads 86.9 at this moment. It may reach 90.

We could resort to air conditioning, but I hate to jump from furnace to A/C without a full windows open opportunity in between. My favorite time of the year is when we can have the windows all open and we can enjoy the fresh breeze. We haven't had a chance to experiment in this house; which windows give the best ventilation, which can be left open at night etc.? I left a window open last Night in my study and it blew some stuff around, no big deal.

I don't have a blog in me, at least if you are thinking of one with much up lifting. This malady seems to have wiped away the wall between emotionalism and physicality. My mood and thoughts seem to affect my shortness of breath, the difficulty I have getting out of chairs, whether I am wobbly or not walking, everything.

If I can be disciplined enough to keep negativity out of my mind it is not so bad, in fact I forget about it for awhile. Keeping the mind clear used to be a practice as in meditation. Now it is an ongoing, daily, life or death struggle.

Perhaps I am readying for the time when we will be able manifest our thoughts directly into form. Who knows?

In any case I can't lose. I can only learn to love more fully. I can only learn the deep significance of forgiveness, and I will especially learn how to keep negativity from my mind.

If you find yourself with some extra energy, I wouldn't mind you sending some my way. I like thoughts and prayers.

HAPPY FRIDAY!

Love and Peace, Gregg

ONENESS VERSUS SEPARATION

I still look at the Evening News. I know it is not a good idea for my consciousness, but I am so curious about how people explain things. I see an ongoing description of the darkness that has risen to the surface. The war is between those who would want the continuation of the darkness and those who seek love and peace. The media gets more attention selling their products when they promote the dark so it often slants in that direction. However, if you are a keen observer, you will see the emergence of the light.

Although, it is mainly just chaotic, one can sense a war going on. I can think of many ways of describing it, but for today I settle on “a war between Separation and Oneness”.

This is the basic ego struggle, I versus the rest. The ego hates Oneness, it leads to peace, love and joy. The ego wants you to feel alone locked up in your psychic castle surrounded by a moat. The ego has no power of its own, it gets its power from us whenever we fall for one of its whiles. The ego's power is the fear that it can engender. The base line: Love versus Fear, or it can be stated, Oneness versus Separation.

With observation and intent, love always wins. That's the good news. The not so good news is that the ego can drag us through the brambly bushes until we correctly observe and form our intent.

I don't know how the rest of you folks are doing in this regard. My ego has been creating an onslaught of negativity. It is very subtle and fortunately I am learning from it without the brambly bush experience.

An example: I spotted my neighbor walking outside and thoughts came to my mind about him that were petty and nonsense. About the second time I met him he said something my ego reacted to. My judgmental ears popped out of the side of my head and I began to look for confirmation of that first idea. I don't know what he said that triggered my ego. It was probably something so mild that on any other day I might not have noticed. We have to be very careful that one small, seemingly inconsequential judgement, doesn't grow. Once a judgement gets lodged in the mind we automatically look for more things to reinforce the original. I have forgiven myself for this and I am sure it is past. I greatly enjoy my neighbor and I love him.

I don't know if the war between Separation and Oneness is being manifest in the individual mind in all kinds of subtle ways or not. Those lucky enough to live in an Ashram maybe be free of this temptation, but I think not.

Well, we need to be observant to what our egos are up to and dismiss their thoughts as they arise.

The light is growing, a new world is emerging.

Have a great Wednesday!

Love and Peace, Gregg

A DREAM

A rainy Monday and only 53 degrees F. We are still basking in the splendor Of yesterday when it was twenty plus degrees warmer and Sunny. A most gorgeous day!

Do you remember saying to small children when you are helping them get there pants on, “Point your toes, point your toes”? Those words came in to my mind, day before yesterday, when on attempting to don my blue jeans I got my foot jammed in one leg. I must have struggled hard because that foot was stuck to stay. I sat down on the edge of the bed, peeled my pants down to the stuck place, and I had a heck of a time getting my foot unstuck. I succeeded. “Point your toes, point your toes” were again the words that flooded through my mind. This time no problem.

How did this happen? How could a 84 year old man forget how to put on a pair of pants? Galloping senility? Oh well such is life.

Around the same time I had a dream and it came back to me again last Night. Dreams are always hard to remember and describe, but this one in particular as it had no definite structure. It started with looking at a piece of official looking paper with headings. [I could never see what they were]. It had a simple line, “Naomi [my daughter] has something of value at your house.” Later a paper appeared before my eyes saying “You have something of value at Naomi's house.”

These papers did not require a signature but they wanted some kind of acknowledgement. Next phase of the dream I was made aware that everyone had papers. Some people didn't like them and they went to court to have them nullified. The court decided they could do nothing as the papers did not demand anything, create any duty, nor did they impinge any loss or suffering on the holders. All that emanated from them was a wish for acknowledgment.

The dream went on and on. I was an observer and I speculated. Just before I awoke a voice went through my mind [this time my Son Stuart's voice]. “The papers are telling us that we are all connected, we all give and receive from each other. We are all One. It is a gentle reminder to acknowledge that.”

It was a powerful dream. Most of my dreams are a smorgasbord of nonsense.

I hope you are having a Happy Holiday wherever you are.

Love and Peace, Gregg

WHAT AILS ME

What I got caught up in, on Wednesday, was a doctors visit. Most of it was waiting but there was much more discussion than usual. I expected to arrive back home by three instead it was after four thirty. I was too weary to blog.

I have been feeling poorly for a couple weeks. Ever since my healing began in earnest in October I would have setbacks usually just at the point when I was thinking, “Boy, I am finally better!” After a week or so I would recover. The set backs included my total body. I would get out of breath easier. I would have a harder time getting in and out of my chair. I would have a harder time meditating. I would be more wobbly and be more concerned with falling. It is hard to describe but it is as if the neuro-muscular and cardiovascular systems were suddenly weakened.

I usually started to snap out of one of these setbacks in a few days. This time, no. So when I went to the doctor I was still in this funk. The blood test etc. gave plenty of explanation for what I was experiencing but did not pinpoint the problem. I did have a mild anemia with no easy explanation and a drop in my hemoglobin. These could be serious signs. He recommended I take some iron to see if it would pep me up. We explored the possibility of some kind of infection or internal bleeding and came up with nothing.

The doctor, of course, being an oncologist had to bring up the possibility of the cancer returning somewhere else in my body. There is no evidence of the esophageal tumor returning.

Everything that is happening at this moment could correct itself. We decided to wait one month and have the blood test again and if they are still off I will have to have scans completed. I will not wait a month if I don't feel better soon.

I don't know what this means for my future blogging. It sets back my announcement for my entry into the presidential race [just kidding- maybe]. I like all the candidates somewhat and some a great deal. What they have to go through to get to be president! I bet the ones with the greatest potential wouldn't consider it.

I thought I could do all my campaigning without leaving my study and I wouldn't spend a penny. I would begin to write some fiery blogs that folks could not resist passing on. I would portray myself as honestly as possible, warts and all. Lovable, of course. I would soon get the ear of The Media and it would come to me. I would not spend any effort or money on promotion. Other folks could take up the nitty gritty stuff of getting me on the ballot.

Well if I am likeable and knowledgeable enough it could be a sure thing. I could run the country from here too! Well one draw back, as long as we are still in this old age, I would have to dodge the assassins.

You can tell I must be sick allowing an ego dream to escape this mind.

I wish I lived at a place where I could raise some vegetables. Some of the mentors, I seek economic advice from, are seeing catastrophe ahead. You know and I know, we will be okay. We all have the capacity to love ourselves and others. I see love catching on everywhere. No matter what happens we will be able to take care of ourselves and our neighbors. I still would like to grub in the dirt and raise some vegetables.

HAPPY FRIDAY!

Love and Peace, Gregg

NO NO BLOG

Hey, I got involved in something that took way more time than I expected. May touch upon it Friday.

Keep loving yourself and everybody body around you!

Love and Peace,  Gregg

TODAY

It is a beautiful Spring Day! Sunny and bright, only 57F but that is a huge improvement over the low of 34F and cloudy of Yesterday.

I think I am going through some kind of evolutionary process. I need to continue to watch my thoughts and forgive and forgive and forgive. Much of the forgiveness is for myself. I wonder how many times we make a silent judgement when an equally silent forgiveness would have sufficed to bring us peace and understanding.

My dreams! They are so convoluted but real. I awake at Night and am not sure immediately that I am not still dreaming. The dreams are not bad dreams. I don't wish I didn't have them, but I am pleased to know they were dreams. I think the dreams create an expectation that I must do something. The disturbing aspect of them is that they are so real, I can't tell them from real life. Of course that raises the question, “Are we dreaming all the time?”

I am out of sync. Our mail comes around 2:30PM. At 1:45 I remembered I had to get a card off to one of my Grandsons. I rushed to get it addressed and got down to the mailbox just before 2PM. The mail was here already. Disappointment! They are never here this early, especially on Monday. Just a few minutes ago, I saw what looked like a mail man coming to the door with a package. I asked him if he was just delivering the mail, he answered in the affirmative. I asked him, “How come there was something in my mail box today? I know I got it Saturday.” He said, “It is probably the new Amazon delivery on Sunday.” That is new to me. I am happy to know my card will go out today.

Slice of life drivel from Gregg Gillett.

And that is all I seem to have. My creative juices are not flowing.

I will continue my day with the intent of making this waking dream as pleasant as possible for myself and those around me. I am going to sit out in the Sun.

Love and Peace, Gregg

TAKING CARE OF BUSINESS

Good Morning! Yes it it early, 9:29 AM at this moment. This afternoon I will be in the bank taking care of big business. Well not really, small potatoes actually. I have to do some things associated with 'getting your affairs in order'. No I don't have a crystal ball telling me of my demise. I meant to take care of these things months ago. One wants to make it as easy as possible for those left to deal with financial matters.

I don't have anything rising to my mind that I should write about. I am a little preoccupied by a few things I need to do before I leave. My bank is in the county I used to live in and it is fifty miles away [Mora, MN] I don't intend to change. I have great loyalty to that bank. They have been with me through the hard times and the easy times. Now-a-days I can do 99% of my banking from my computer.

By evening we will have a little better idea how the trade war will affect the economy.

I should be back here about 4PM and if there is anything I feel I need to write about I will.

All we can do is just love ourselves and everybody around us, stay in the moment and see only love.

Happy Friday Everyone!

Love and Peace, Gregg

THE STRUGGLE

I have nothing to say! Everything is up in the air! All the decisions made on the world stage appear absolutely nutty. The empire is madly heading for economic destruction while it flirts with war with all its might.

Despite all of this, the enlightenment seems to be on schedule. Last week an ex-rapper appeared on an evening talk show. I think his name was Common. [Okay, I am not up to date on many aspects of our culture]. He was a very engaging person. He was touting a book he wrote that sounded like it advocated the solutions to all our problems was making all our decisions with love. Wow.

Last night, on the same talk show, an actor was touting a book he wrote which seemed to be promoting the idea of getting in touch with ourselves at a soul level. I think it was a story of his own journey of discovering he was a soul immersed in love and not a body.

There is much evidence that folks are paying more and more attention for the need to heal our problems with love.

The dichotomy is getting clearer, were either in the fear basket or the love basket. Like fish we can leap from one to the other. I can tell you first hand the fear basket is awful, awful, awful.

I think there is still a big bunch of people teetering. They want to believe in love, but they are afraid to be fooled. Their lives have been a struggle and it seems so risky to trust that love is the answer. For these folks, two celebrity types promoting love can be a tipping point. [If one of you readers knows the actor/comedian's name please share it]

The rest of us can help by recommitting, as many times as necessary, to live in the moment with love. It can be difficult, part of our minds are attracted to darkness and the darkness can seem so near. I defeat myself by looking at the idiot box. I think I am above being effected negatively, after all, I just want to see how people think. I think it is true that when I am on top of my game I can watch the news without irritation, but lately I have been getting angry. The darkness feeds on our negative energy. If we can't observe it without a negative emotion, best not.

It is certainly best if we just focus on the love that we see around us. We will build a world created by love. Actually, I think it is already here. We just have to find a way to step in. We are all energy dynamos. Let our emissions be Unconditional Love.

Love and Peace, Gregg

WORLD ECONOMICS

I was siting in my easy chair. Sometimes meditating, sometimes dozing off, my usual Morning enjoyment. Once in a while it would cross my mind that this was a blog day. What was I going to write today? Then I remembered the tariff war with China. Had to check the stock market – Dow Jones down over 600- then over 700- now back to 670 or so down.

It sounds like a lot, but as a percentage of the market it isn't. The market has been over-inflated for a long time. It would have to be down well over a thousand to be of any significance. However the significance of this downer is in what it is response to, which is the raising of tariffs on imported goods from China. This mini-market crash is caused by the concern of every major importer and retailer that it will raise the price of everything to the consumer and threaten our fragile recovery.

I have been following the World's economy for years. I got interested about fifty years ago and have been paying attention with various intensity ever since.

American/ Chinese economy is tricky. It is hard to see who benefits most from any changes. When Nixon 'opened' China the greatest resource China had were a billion underemployed people [at least in the capitalistic sense]. American companies salivated and fell over each other to establish factories there. American companies thought there was too big a percentage of their profits going to labor; which created our middle class. At first it looked like a win/win situation as the prices of all those goods made in China were much less. However, it didn't take long for the tuned in folks to know this was at the cost of the middle class. From the late 1970's on the the financial health of the working and middle class got worse, stagnant in many cases.

The powers that be were reluctant to accept they had any blame for the stagnation of the middle class. They pointed to this new service economy which would save us. Never mind that in the early seventies one person could support a large family and send their kids to college. Soon two fully employed parents couldn't keep up. And it got worse and is getting worse. All those supposedly healthy statistics of our present economy are bogus. I can easily punch holes in their claims but that is a different subject.

For the last twenty years there have been attempts to alter our economic relations with China so we could get a better deal. What do you do when they make virtually everything we buy? We forget that it was American companies that started it and are still heavily involved. Any punishment of China therefore is also a loss of money to American corporation and the moneyed class itself. So there was continuous tinkering by the past administrations but great caution to avoid the cliff.

I think the real reason this administration got its undies in a bunch is that there is evidence that the China is winning the war for global control of the economy. The World is tired of the American style of economic bullying and many countries are paying attention to the promise of closer relations with China.

The administration thinks it can force a better deal with China by unleashing the bully. I don't see what side of the bed these folks get up on, but there is no chance we can win an economic war with China. China could concede to save the World economy, but if this is what the administration wants they need to use cookies and cream not bullying.

China is holding all the cards. We better start playing nice or our economy will be in the crapper.

Friday we will have a better picture.

Readers of this blog know that if we eschew all fear and continue to love in the moment we will be okay. More than Okay! Appropriate leadership will arise to steer us to sanity.

Love and Peace, Gregg

CAN WE REGAIN WHAT WE LOST?

From 1975 to 1984 we lived without running water. We had a pump outside the kitchen door and an outdoor toilet at the end of a path some fifty feet away. We had wood stoves for heat and a wood cooking range in the kitchen. I still had a private practice going in the city until 1977 so we kept our electricity hooked up and a telephone. In 1977 I left my practice in the city and we terminated our electricity and telephone. From then on it was kerosene lamps and candles for lighting. We intended to live off our small farm the way the homesteaders did. Someday I may write more extensively about this time, but I bring it up now to help fill out the background on a story I would like to tell.

During this period we attracted many visitors. Despite having no way of communication we had plenty of company. Some people would come for a Morning's visit and stay for the weekend. Others stayed for a week or two. In the Summer we had people camping out in the woods that surrounded our property. We met some wonderful people and sat around the campfire until the light would break many times. We had many long winter stretches alone, of course, but even then we often had company on weekends.

I rejoined the World's work force in the Summer of 1984 and our life changed.

Flash forward to 2002[?]. Jamie was working and I was alone in the house. It was Summer. Two gentlemen came to visit. I knew one of them from those early days. I wasn't sure whether I had met the other before. He identified himself as a Medicine Man.

They must have visited for a couple hours. We settled all the important questions in the world. I noticed, off and on, that the Medicine Man seemed to be doing something with his hands, blocked from my view.

Just before leaving the Medicine Man gave me a braided band of grass about two foot long. He said it was sweet grass and I could put it under my pillow or hang it near my head and it would give me sweet dreams.

I hung it on the edge of a picture in my bedroom. I loved looking at it but can't say it improved my dreams. It may have.

Some sixteen years later we moved here. We gave away the picture the sweet grass hung on and I decided to hang the sweet grass in my new study. I thought it might bring a peaceful aura to my surroundings and it went with the décor.

It hadn't occurred to me that my dreams were work filled and troubled since we moved here. Then I went through my 'mattress week' and they became more troubled.

On the basis of an intuitive flash I moved the sweet grass to my bedroom and hung it on a picture near the head of the bed. My dreams improved and continued to improve. It has been about two weeks now and last Night I had the best sleep I have had since moving here.

We could debate this until the cows come home. I don't want to, I believe we have lost a great deal when we moved from the earth onto our present extensions. We all come from indigenous folks at some point. What did we lose?

One time at the end of a dinner party [I don't remember the conversation], my Grandmother stated we came from “Good Peasant Stock.” I was somewhat taken back by this pronouncement, because the family was more likely to wax eloquently about their important forebears.

I don't know what Grandma had in her mind that day, but I mulled it over and over and I began to love the picture of being a peasant, living on the land self sufficiently, living and loving the rhythm of nature. Peasants had some sense of their indigenous roots and they formed the backbone of the whole society.

I would love to retrieve what we lost. I would love to be able to go through the woods and see a plant and know it would help with a headache or fever. I know our Universe is Unconditionally Loving and Nature as part of it, has a remedy for everything that ails us.

HAPPY FRIDAY FOLKS!

Love and Peace, Gregg

HOW DO WE GET THROUGH IT?

How do we get through it? Despite our belief in a better world just on the horizon, how do we get from here to there without going mad? I haven't seen a crazier World in my 84 years.

I know how you do it. I have been doing it. We have to decide we will only focus on the love around us and dismiss the rest. We start with ourselves by affirming we are loving and deserving beings who are precious to a Loving Universe. It takes work to give up all those old negative programs of self, inculcated from an unfriendly environment. We can do it. As we love ourselves more, we radiate more love around us. Friends and family members note it and respond.

People all over the World are making conscious decisions to see only the Light. When couples, families, and groups make a conscious decision together to bring in the Light it goes much faster than the individual effort. Both work.

It is possible to live in a World of Love and for the most part ignore the nuttiness. We can't deny the existence of the craziness, but we can see it as fear based and unreal. Our relationships can be based on the giving and receiving of thoughts and ideas created with Love.

We are going through a stage where the crumbling of the Old World, created by fear, seems to be exploding with negative energy. It is a last gasp! All of us still have active egos. As long as we are in bodies our egos will have something to say and we must console them and cajole them and reassure them we don't need their guidance. It can be tough though, we were so assured we were on the right path and now we are flooded with doubt.

We will get through it. Back to the basics. Become sensitive to any thought that is diminishing to self and replace it with a loving thought. Spend at least once a day, paying attention only to the moment, see only love. No thoughts of past and none of future. Several short times a day are better than one long period. Everybody is different, however what works for me may not for you.

Fear can take on very attractive packaging, even convincing us it is protecting us. When paranoid thinking creeps in, we know we took in a gift horse. Staying in the moment and seeing only love protects us from most of these errors.

One of the traps we must avoid, is taking the bait, and ranting and railing at the crazy world. Anger and all negative emotion only feed into the craziness. We will learn to confront everything with love. When we know we are love, we can do it.

I had some set-backs on my own path towards Oneness. I have crawled back out of my hole and will talk more about it when it is more of a distant story.

I think our wonderful cleaning lady is about to knock on the door.

Meet me here Friday.

Love and Peace, Gregg

LOVE IS A BETTER IDEA

My mentors encourage me to see a beautiful world just on the horizon. It is a World of Love, Peace and Joy. Everybody has what they need. No more rich or poor. No more haves or have-nots. They say it is becoming visible now and would be seen by most if it wasn't for the Cabal controlled media. We are on the verge of many marvels like free energy which has been repressed. They go on and on spinning their picture of a perfect world.

Oh I believe it! There was a time when I could get into a meditative state where I could see it, perhaps not clearly, but I could experience the brilliant light of this New World.

Looking out my high place I could see the brutality of what we call 'reality' as just an illusion, a vision seen and made without love. I knew nothing made without love was real.

I went through a week to ten days when my energy was low [as described in earlier blogs]. Instead of looking out the penthouse window I became accustomed to looking out the third and fourth level windows and sometimes even trying to peek though the crack in the basement level.

Wow! What we think of 'reality' is a horrible thing! The idea that a society can exist where the very first thought is not, “How we can best care for and love each other.” And we have been in this craziness for centuries, eons.

It seems so simple. Even our most clumsy attempts at correcting the mess would be far better than what we have now, if we simply began with the idea of making the most loving decision we could for every problem. We might fumble and make errors but the light would shine through and we would be joined by the best and the brightest.

I can't say the descent down the tower was pleasant and I don't want to do it again. At first I claw my way back up, and then when I can, I float back up on a meditative wave. However, I am not firmly established in the penthouse. Boy, do I have to watch my thoughts. I need to keep re-committing myself to having only loving thoughts. I am constantly reminded of how I create my experience by bringing a thought from outside my being and embracing it. I can be flooded with negative thoughts and they have no effect if I don't embrace them. I can let them float away without harm. It is my mind, I get to decide what lives there. Of course it helps to acknowledge I share my mind with Mother/Father God.

Yes! I can see my mentors are right when I can poke my nose out a high window. There is a mass awakening taking place. People are waking up to the simple conclusion that love is a better idea.

Imagine how simple. LOVE IS A BETTER IDEA.

Love and Peace, Gregg

TAKING CARE

Good Morning! It is just a shade past 8:30 AM and it seems strange to blog. I might have bit off more than I can chew or write. I decided to blog early because my Daughters, Laura and Naomi, are arriving at Noon to help with some estate planning.

It occurred to me, in one of my spurts of responsible thinking, that Jamie might need help with financial and other matters if I suddenly dropped dead. I certainly don't expect it to happen but folks my age can depart the planet with little warning.

In any case we should have a nice visit and get some work done.

I need to write this blog and go to the grocery store and be back here by 11:30 AM.

I am feeling much better. I more or less got a handle on things. I don't know if it was because of the lack of good sleep or the mini-sun stroke or what, but I discovered I was choosing fear thoughts over love on a regular basis. I was having trouble meditating and getting to that loving spot I had become familiar with.

The ego can be extremely tricky. It can invite you to have a fear thought and disguise it it as simple evaluation of realty. For example, Jamie made some real improvement in her condition, instead of celebratory thoughts I chose thoughts of caution that were thinly disguised beliefs that thing wouldn't get better. In other areas of my life like my own health I was also choosing negativity. I have been around the block for 84 years waltzing and dancing with this ego. I don't easily get seduced into making negative thought choices.

No wonder I couldn't meditate as I was used to. It is getting better. I am having an excellent Morning, although in some ways it seems like I am back in grade school when I thought I was a post-graduate student.

This is an excellent subject, how we can let our egos deny the increasing love around us? Egos are terrified of love, although I think they calm down if treated tenderly like a tantruming child. I was telling mine that I won't forget it as we merge into oneness. They need to be thanked for the eons they protected us from danger to our bodies.

The love is increasing all around us. Expect ego flare-ups. Don't let them get you down. No matter what the crazy thoughts you may endure or even indulge, just forgive yourself and move on. Nothing but love is real. Don't waste time criticizing yourself. Anything but love is meaningless.

Let us continue focusing on the love we see and ask the Loving Universe to expand our minds and hearts so we see more.

The real world is breaking through the clouds of illusion. It is Love.

Next week I will expand on this topic and share more of my personal journey.

HAPPY FRIDAY!

Love and Peace, Gregg

CRAZIER THAN A SEWING NEEDLE

Life can be weird. The Saturday before Easter it was Sunny and hot. I sat out most of the day in the Sun. It crossed my mind I might be overdoing it. I was fine Easter but Monday I began to feel washed out and drained of energy. [That began my mattress saga and sleep deprivation] I think I got a little Sun stroke. I have had that happen by being out in Sun too long before. I always recovered in a day. Of course I didn't have the sleep deprivation and I wasn't 84 years old.

I am getting better. It is disturbing because it seems to set me back in my recovery process. I have big dreams of being able to get up in the Morning and walk to the station store to get the paper. Every time I am on the verge of it something happens. Last time it was a snowstorm before that it was something else. I have had set-backs in my recovery before but I thought I was over them.

I have been practicing being in the moment and loving it. I got to the point where I could deal with ups and downs of my surroundings and stay loving and centered. Suddenly that is more difficult. I am not surprised because I had too easy a time reaching that space, I figured I had more learning to do.

I don't think there are any accidents. I think I needed to relapse a little to learn what I needed to learn. I was still carrying around a bunch of hidden judgements. I have whole lot of crap that I need to release before I can readily inhabit that unconditionally loving space. I am still crazier than that Sewing Needle on the end of your fishing pole. I don't know why that picture came into my mind. You know the bug called a Sewing Needle? It is like a small dragon fly and for some reason they like sitting on the end of your pole when you are out on the lake. I associate them mostly with my Grandfather. Like me, he had a lot of patience and he loved quiet. We could sit out for hours floating in a boat with the only excitement the Sewing Needles that would come sit on the end of our poles, they preened, some were green and some were golden colored.

Of course I am crazier than the Sewing Needles. They are part of the beauty of the universe. Oh, could I know my part and be that sane!

Well I have to make this blog short. I need to go to the grocery store and get some essentials. I will give you an update on my sanity Friday. I will be blogging early Friday as my afternoon is scheduled.

Love and Peace, Gregg