HAPPY NEW YEAR

2018 is coming to an end. During its progress I did not think much about it. Just about an hour ago, I was thinking back and thought. “Wow what a year.” I had an illness that insisted on me contemplating the possibility of death. A recovery that was slow but miraculous. We made a major life changing move. Jamie struggled with health problems.Yes! “Wow what a year!” And the outside world. The world reflected on the boob tube. It was a crazy comic book version of reality.

Ah......... let's let the old year go without regret or recrimination. Let us bless it and put it in the past. A new World beckons! The light is coming on! Person after person is opening their eyes and seeing! They are thinking, “Hey this is crazy. We don't need to live this way. All that we need to be happy is to love and care for each other.”

We have always known that haven't we? Yes! It is time. We are beginning to see. ONESS IS.

I awoke this Morning in a positive mood. My insomnia is fading away. I slept fairly well the last three Nights or so. I felt like I was glowing. The weights I have been carrying around were lifted from my shoulders. I have read message after message that was greatly positive for 2019. It is pictured as a year where folks finally shrug off the craziness of the manipulators who seek power and wealth, we emerge like a glorious butterfly from an ancient and scarred chrysalis.

Let it be so!

We are the creators. Let us hold only visions of Love in our minds. Love, Joy and Peace are ours.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Love and Peace, Gregg

LONELINESS

What am I doing here? Do I mean on this Earth? In this body? Or why am I sitting here at this keyboard? All of that, perhaps. I don't know what to write about. I was kicking around the idea of writing about loneliness, but that is such a huge subject. Where do I start? At some level we are all lonely and searching for connection.

Our whole existence can be described in our attempts to overcome our separation from Oneness.

But most people when they talk about loneliness start at the other end. We live in a society, that with all its pretenses of the opposite, promotes isolation. We do not promote individuals connecting with each other. We do not take care of each other in that way. Has it always been true that society does not respond to those in need of companionship after a death or divorce? I don't know. I see it. Some folks belong to churches or other groups that respond to this need, but many don't.

There are so many levels and types of loneliness. There is the person who goes from a nourishing relationship to emptiness due to divorce or death. There are folks with chronic problems who feel no one can really appreciate what they are experiencing. There are folks that were taught from infancy that no one really cares and they don't try to reach out to anyone.

I suspect that folks were more sensitive to others in this area in communities of the past. It seems as we have come more and more into this modern age we have increased our personal isolation. Walk into any restaurant and notice tables occupied by folks looking at their electronic devices rather than talking to each other.

Every house has a television set. Hey that doesn't do it. Folks need face to face interaction. They need to hug each other. They need to be not hesitant to share with others that sometimes they are lonely. We are all lonely sometime. It should never be agonizingly painful.

That first layer of loneliness, the need for companionship should be supplied by the community. Instead of staring at the idiot box, we should be getting together a couple nights a week to share our musical or other talents. We are so rich in our ability to entertain each other. The fact that we stay isolated in our houses rather than getting together is mind boggling to me. We could write a book about that.

Some folks carry the loneliness around with them. They don't feel they have anything to offer. They have yet to learn that to give and receive are the same. When we feel empty and think we have nothing to give, we cannot receive either. Giving is receiving. Receiving is giving.

We are all lonely. This world promotes isolation and encourages loneliness. We need to feel complete. That feeling is not dependent on others. There are some hermits that do not know loneliness. They know their Oneness with all even if they see no one.

Our world has promoted divisiveness for centuries. We can't have divisiveness without isolation and separation at the individual level. At the macro level divisiveness was promoted to get us to go to war with each other. The more separation created between different peoples the easier it is to control them. If one looks at some of the so-called world leaders you will see that phenomena right now.

We are One. We cannot have a practice at the macro level that doesn't effect the individual.

The loneliness of the individual is always accented during holiday periods, especially the Christmas Season. The message is that there is something wrong with us if we are lonely. That may be true, but there is something more wrong with a world that promotes separation.

At every level the solution is love. We can't wait for that to happen at the macro level, as we awaken we will shrug off these so called leaders and they will be replaced by those who make loving decisions. For now to overcome our loneliness, we need to appreciate our richness. We need to see we have a great deal to give. We need to love ourselves. Instead of wallowing in our loneliness we can look around us and see others that may need our company. The problem with that solution is that if we don't love ourselves we don't believe we have anything to give. Let us not spin around in that self-defeating place.

Sometimes we have to put our hand on our own collar and pull ourselves out of a crazy place. We can do it. We are not empty husks. We are all part of the One Creative Being which is Love. We are therefore Love. We are never really alone.

I wish I could have everyone in a room with me so I could teach them a little bit about going inside and feeling the warmth of love that resides in all of us.
 
We are not empty! We are brimming with Love.

Love and Peace, Gregg

HAPPY ST. STEPHEN'S DAY

HAPPY ST. STEVEN'S DAY! It was boxing day in England past. The day after Christmas the Haves boxed up their excess and gave it to the Have-nots. Wouldn't that be nice if that was truly a tradition with some substance. The well to do could raise the poor out of their poverty. Heck, the super rich could pay for the education of all those wanting to attend college and have money left over to underwrite medical care for those that need it. Well, someday, keep your mind on what should be rather than what is. We should all spend some time each day imagining a sane world.

Stop and picture how isolated we are. I don't know any poor people personally. At least I don't know how poor they really are. I have children who are saddled by mountainous student loans, which is debt slavery and should be against the law, but their everyday lives are okay, they have good housing and nutritious food.

When Jamie and I were in the midst of our sabbatical, wresting a living from the land, we met all kinds of people from that economical world we don't see now. I spent the last ten years of my life not knowing anybody that didn't have at least a master's degree. They were not rich but if they ever knew poverty it was far behind them. I knew poverty. When I was going to college we lived off the crumbs of those receiving some kind of assistance. My brother had a neighbor who didn't want the cornmeal and other things they received. My brother passed them on to me and I had cornmeal bread in the lunch I took everyday to school. Some of those crumbs were great they included honey, butter etc., surplus commodities the government would have to store. The government bought up farm goods to keep the prices stabilized. Do they still do that?

Back to my theme, there seems to be an invisible wall between groups in our supposed classless society. Once I graduated from college my life changed. It isn't that I ever knew any desperately poor people but I knew of their existence. But even as a Social Worker, I may have worked with desperately poor people. But they weren't an intimate part of my life. We seem to identify with our social group to the point of not seeing the whole.

When Jamie and I lived without money we seemed to attract others in similar circumstances. Some were like us, a temporary, perhaps even a voluntary situation, but others had known little else but a hand to mouth existence. Some of the folks had marketable skills but they worked only enough to survive. What was so amazing is, as a group, how rich they were in experience, wisdom and general intelligence. I had some of the most profound philosophical discussions with folks that never saw an ivy hall; folks who always were dealing with the most earthy aspects of life.

When I decided to rejoin the salaried society. These folks stopped coming around. Our world changed. People were accustomed to stopping by when it occurred to them. We had no telephone and our garden and animals created our schedule. If we were doing chores when they dropped in they often pitched in and gave us news of the world they encountered. All of a sudden we were in a different rhythm. Some of the folks would drop in on weekends, but the world changed.

We always attracted the intellectual, educated folk. They would come up from the cities and have coffee and discuss the world situation with whoever was there. It was a truly egalitarian group of equals.

But why did that curtain have to be redrawn between the social groups? How much of that energy emanated from me? Did I no longer want to associate with them? I don't think that is true. Was it just because the rhythm of our lives changed so much? My first salaried position demanded that I drive 70 miles one way, five days a week. I only had weekends for most of the chores and I would be wrung out.

Is the separation primarily economic? I see people in the grocery store who are probably struggling in a true hand to mouth existence. Could we be friends?

I have always seen class as the peak in which we view the world. Some can only see the hustle and bustle of survival. At every level we see humanity at a different level. We get to the level of ideas and finally we get to see 'wholeness'.

During the short time Jamie and I were living off the land, I knew several people who could see at the highest level even though they seemed to be at the hustle/bustle level. They could have exchanged ideas with any intellectual giant on Earth.

Is this separation and isolation all a product of our craziness? Our judgement? I know we are all ONE do you?

Love and Peace, Gregg

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

The Sun came out a few minutes ago! Wow! It is bright. We have been so shy of sunshine that it seems more than natural. We have missed it. It is great that the light appeared to help us celebrate Christmas Eve.

Christmas Eve was the big celebration when I was growing up. The extended family gathered at our maternal Grandparents home. We had lutefisk, mashed potatoes, a great quantity of melted butter and what goes with that for dinner. No my Grandparents were not Scandinavian. My Grandmother was German and English. My Grandfather was Irish and Yankee[?]. I think it was common for folks in the last half of the Nineteenth Century to label themselves as Yankee and not disclose their European origin. [My Great Grandfather on my Dad's side of the family also called himself a Yankee]. I don't know where the lutefisk tradition came from. I miss it and would like to have it now.

In our family Santa trimmed the tree on Christmas Eve. After dinner we all went upstairs to wait for Santa. Some of the older folks went up with the kids, the other adults were supposed to be in the kitchen washing dishes. We gathered in our Grandparent's bedroom and watched eagerly out the window hoping to get a glimpse of the sleigh. You can't believe the excitement. After what seemed like an eternity a door would slam and we would hear shouts from downstairs, “Santa was here, Santa was here!”

We would roar down the stairs and and find a room lit only by candlelight. Around the tree were piled gifts from Santa. Even the Christmas Tree was lit with candles. It, also, had a string of electric lights but for the first evening it had candles. There seemed to be an uncle whose main job was to keep an eye on the candles to prevent a conflagration.

It was magical! Long after we were too old to believe in Santa we joined the younger, believing cousins upstairs to share the magic. We were probably well into our teens before we stayed with the adults downstairs.

Most of the family was Catholic [believing and non-believing]. The family had a tradition of marrying Non-Catholics. Mixed marriages were the rule rather than the exception. None the less, most would head out to church for Mid-Night Mass and some would stay home and continue the celebration with Tom and Jerrys. [sp?]

Then there was Midnight lunch. When folks arrived back from church the Midnight lunch would have been started. It consisted of fried ham, ham gravy, scrambled eggs and I am forgetting the most important part. What did we put the ham gravy on? Some kind of fried bread? Oh, my mind my mind, I can almost see it, I can taste it, what was it? If I remember before the blog is over I will add it at the end.

As much as this time is for remembering our traditions, it is even more a time of starting anew.

We have gone full cycle. We expanded with the light. We developed our fruit [created]. We retreated in contemplation of our year's creation. Now it is time to expand with the light again. We have learned something. We have learned what is cherish-able and what we would like to give up.

We see from the experience that has just passed, what we created with our thoughts and attitudes, we know what we want to bring into the new year and what we want to leave behind.

The Sun is shining in my study window and it is bathing me in glorious light. It truly feels like the Love of the Universe. Ahhh I think I will leave this blog as it is and expand with the Light.

Merry Christmas everyone! The Light does return!

Love and Peace, Gregg

FRIDAY? SATURDAY?

What day is it? My calendar says it is Saturday Dec 22. What happened to Friday?

Last Night as I was preparing to go to bed shortly after Midnight, I realized I didn't write a blog! It was startling! How did I forget? It wasn't that unusual a day.

Yesterday Morning the people who installed our shower came out to make some corrections. When we moved in we had a shower in a bathtub. We had to step over the side of the bathtub to take a shower. That system is fine for most people and it was for me most of my life. But at 83 and recovering from chemo and radiation it was a bit much. I could do it with difficulty and when I got in I was afraid I was going to fall down as it was slippery. The appropriate bath mat would have solved the slippery problem but I still would not like it.

We went to Menard's and picked out a shower stall with a seat and had it installed by a wonderful local company. The two guys that did the work had a frustrating time getting it in. They seemed to to be successful however, but when we had a friend come in to do the sheet-rocking around the surround, about a six inch strip around the perimeter of the shower stall, he found things that needed correcting before he could do the work. It has been a frustrating period. We could use the shower and we loved it, but to have a project that is not quite finished hanging over one's head is indeed frustrating.

Well after a couple visits evaluating the situation, one of the original installers came out yesterday and made the necessary corrections. We don't fault the company or the workmen. That is how life comes to us sometimes. How do we say it, “shit happens.”

I don't know if that is why I forgot to write a blog. I don't think so. Yesterday was a strange day. Some frustrating happenings and some amazing successes. By the time bedtime came I realized it was a great day to be thankful for.

I have discovered that if we can only quit complaining and focus on our thankfulness our life becomes much more pleasant. We might actually create more and more things to be thankful for. I find I need reminding of this ever so often. It is amazing how much we can change our life just by altering the thoughts that stream through our minds.

I am thankful for an amazing life and I have nothing to complain about.

I assume I will be writing Monday and wishing everybody a “Merry Christmas.” I don't think I could forget another blog.

I hope everyone is having a great Saturday! Or is it Friday?

Love and Peace, Gregg

KNOWING ONENESS

I found an old blog from June 13, 2012 when I was shuffling through some old papers. I don't know why I printed it. It is the only one I have printed. It contained everything I think I know so I was going to re-post it instead of writing a new blog for today. I thought it would be simple but when I post it to Facebook I can't get it to come up. I will have to enlist the aid of one of my tech-savvy children.

So, I haven't been mulling anything around in my head to write about. Folks have heard me say that teachers 'teach what they are trying to learn'. It is true in my case. One of the things I am trying to appreciate is the meaning of Oneness. I don't struggle with it intellectually. It all makes perfect sense. We inhabit bodies that are separate and we have come to believe we are as separate as our bodies seem to be. In truth we are all part of the creative source and each part has the capability of creating its own illusion. So we live in an individual illusion created by our thoughts and share a joint illusion with the whole.

We create with love or fear so it behooves us to hold only loving thoughts in our minds. As we raise our own consciousness we help everyone else raise theirs by the loving energy that emanates from us. When enough of us choose loving thoughts most of the time the group illusion will change from a fearful one to a loving one. The media is not a good witness to the state of the joint illusion as the media is controlled by those who seek wealth and power through fear. Our consensus or joint illusion is much healthier than most of us realize.

So what I am trying to learn: I have been reading that the solution to finding deep peace is knowing our Oneness. As I say I don't have any problem intellectually but I have trouble finding the place through meditation. My sources urge me to spend a short period, at least twice a day, in this knowingness. It is suppose to help greatly in bringing peace or restoring peace to the individual. I think my difficulty is related to my insomnia which began some three months ago. I have been eliminating reasons for my insomnia and I think it relates to a struggle I have accepting life moment by moment as it comes to me. I think I fail to embrace my life with love in the moment. I won't go into details, but I know what I need to work on.

Our problem is always fear that leads to judgement so we can project the problem outward. It is a neat trick but it brings us only misery.

I know our Oneness in my mind. I need to feel it in my heart. I will and so will the rest of you.

Love and Peace, Gregg

CHANGING TIMES

We have no snow! Oh, perhaps a teeny patch here and there. It doesn't look much like Christmas. That is okay with me. I have seen enough snow in my almost eighty four years on Planet Earth. When I was a sprat we had several snowless Christmases. It was especially problematic when Santa Claus brought us skis or a sled for Christmas. We didn't expect snow until January. We had some early snow, like the 1940 Armistice Day blizzard. I was five and in first grade. My Mom let us go to school with just sweaters because it was so warm [fortyish F]. We resisted wearing coats when we could. I don't know what kind of weather reporting they had in those days but I am sure they were aware of what was developing in the West via radio stations. In any case they let us out of school by Noon and our walk home was through sleet or pelleting snow. By supper time we were snowed in. My Grandpa worked downtown [a load dispatcher for NSP]. He didn't get home for a couple days. His relief couldn't get to work. The streetcars weren't running.

Getting snow for Christmas was iffy until the fifties. I was fifteen in 1950 and I remember a switch in the weather pattern. We started getting snow before Christmas. And lots of snow. I remember riding down rural roads and it was like going through a tunnel. The snow was so high on the side of the road one couldn't see over it. I shouldn't generalize that was probably just one year of the fifties. The images from childhood stick and grow.

I will accept whatever weather comes our way.

I am enjoying this mild entree into Winter. I am just now recovering well enough that I can get around outside. It would be nice if it continued until it was feasible to begin our pining for Spring.

I would really like to talk about the World condition but it is so deplorable, so confusing, so depressing, so dark I don't want to. I have come to the conclusion that nothing reflected in the media holds much truth. There is such great division. Yet all sides are out of their minds. No....no I won't go in to it.

Some of you know I have an interest in broad economic events. I more or less look at the ups in downs of the economy over time. I look at the stock market trends [world wide] several times a day. I study the rise and fall of the world currencies. I am interested in how nations interface economically.

I have made predictions a few times and I am always wrong. Actually, the prediction is usually correct but my timing is off. The economy is always more durable and the status quo more resistant to change than I anticipate. With that in mind, we are again at a point where the stock market could take a severe beating. The thousand point recent drop is nothing compared to what could happen. The market is more speculative than it was in 1929. There are tech companies that are valued in the billions that haven't earned one dime. Flush, cash rich institutions are betting on the come. It doesn't always work out in poker and it is not likely to work out now. There is a crumbling at the core of many huge financial institutions. The EU could come apart. The empire is rotting away. The East is rising the West is passe. We are in for some interesting times.

Despite all the insanity in the world, I believe sanity [loving common sense] is also on the rise. It is going to arise in countries and regions of the world that we don't expect.

The propaganda narrative is so turned around and distorted, we don't know what is happening in the world.

We will be okay! Let us keep our center, stay in the moment, make all of our decisions in the most loving way possible. The Earth may shake. We will be okay.

Love and Peace, Gregg

CONTINUING THE WORK

Usually I am finished with my blog by now [2:38PM]. The Morning was filled with unexpected events and challenges. All good. Yes, life has a mind of it's own and it keeps coming.

I think it is fun to speculate on how we contribute to the creation of life's events. It counters the danger of feeling like a victim to understand our hand [or mind] in the happenings of our life.

Feeling like a victim is a no-way-out situation. It creates a helplessness which brings more negativity in our lives. I shouldn't say no-way-out. There is always a way. We can always revisit a situation and get a new take on it. Forgiveness of ourselves and others is the surest release.

We all need to work on ourselves, but we needn't be dire about it. We should hold an ideal in our mind for ourselves, but we can't take ourselves so seriously that we judge ourselves by comparison. Judgement of self is a condemnation that helps no one.

Our little self or separated self never sees the big picture. We can have high spiritual thoughts that come from our convictions, but we are going to have little self thoughts too. That is okay. As long as we are in bodies this duality will exist.

We are discovering what thoughts are destructive and we are learning to dismiss them before they take hold and breed more. Fear is at the base of all our destructive thinking. We have had a lifetime of absorbing both big and little fears from our families, culture, experience, education etc. We don't shed them overnight.

When we are tortured by negative thoughts, it helps to know what fear we hold that supports the thoughts. Sometimes we don't want to know. We need to be gentle with ourselves. We need to be loving and considerate of ourselves. This is a big undertaking. Most of us don't have Gurus and Ashrams to guide and comfort us. We are doing it on our own which traditionally had the help of some spiritual surroundings, whether it be Gurus, Lamas, Monks or Shaman.

Many folks are getting together in groups to give each other guidance. I think that would be very beneficial. There is an energy on the Earth right now, so even if you are searching yourself by yourself there is help. There is a love around us that is just waiting for an invitation to embrace us. I pause for a minute in my typing and I can feel it like a warm blanket of Love. I can't say I know what Oneness feels like but that word comes to my mind.

We continue the work on ourselves. We expand our light and share it with those around us. Our light will circle the globe and eventually encapsulate everyone.

HAPPY FRIDAY!

Love and Peace, Gregg

LIFE KEEPS COMING

It is not 11:30AM yet. It feels much later. I have been up since five. Insomnia is still with me but it is getting a bit better.

Yesterday I had my last doctor's appointment at First Light in Mora. The visit was with the oncologist who has been following my case since the beginning. He showed us the results of the PET scan and reiterated what he told me on the phone. He said the results of the PET scan were far better than he had hoped. He felt my situation bears watching for awhile but supports switching to the clinic here. He is going to retire soon. Yesterday was his 67^th birthday. He is a truly great man and doctor. I will miss him.

No more fifty mile trips to the doctor. It is bittersweet. I have become to love First Light, everybody is so familiar, friendly and competent. It is more bittersweet for Jamie as she used to be a nurse there and every few steps someone is saying, “Hi Jamie.”

We did some shopping in Mora. We miss the friendly merchants. Although we didn't intend it, it was a goodbye adventure. We won't have reason to visit Mora very often. I still bank there but I do all my business on line. We developed a lot of relationships living in a small town for 43 years.

We are developing some good relationships here in Sauk Rapids. Sauk Rapids, Sauk Rapids, Sauk Rapids................. I need to say that over and over, it is my hometown now. It has much better restaurants and many entertainment options and everything is close. My doctor is only five minutes away. We will embrace it. We will become People of the Rapids.

Life comes to us one day at a time. We may be the creators, but life, also, has a life of its own. Sometimes it surprises us. Sometimes it is delightful. Sometimes it is dreary. It keeps coming. Fighting it is futile. Peace comes with accepting it. No matter what is happening, accept it as your creation. Be in the moment, love what you can, your actions will be right actions.

When are we going to finally accept that love is the only solution. Whether it be our personal lives or the world stage it is obvious the solution is love. I know many who read this blog already agree with that premise. I know, world over, more people see love as the solution than anything else. The awakening is real and it is happening.

Yet when we experience the World as reflected by the media, we see nothing but turmoil and strife, a World driven by fear.

It troubles me when I see people of excellent heart taking a fighting stance against what they think is evil. We can't fight evil. We can't fight darkness. We can only bring light. Light a candle as they say. We have had many great teachers all through history who have given this message. Martin Luther King and Mahatma Gandhi were two recent ones. Jesus Christ could be included as a recent one as his message has been kept alive, even though it seems like his adherents missed it. Read the Beatitudes.

The only thing missing in those who do not act with love is their connection with their own center which is love. They don't love themselves which gives their egos free reign. The ones who seem most corrupt don't believe in love and can't believe they are lovable or capable of love. They have given up on love and embrace power and wealth as the only way to feel satisfied. Of course there is no lasting satisfaction in power or wealth so they thirst for more and more hoping to be satisfied.

We need to see how pathetic their situation is and have some compassion. They can only manipulate and use us with our permission. The cleverest of these folks, down through the ages, have used fear to manipulate us. Divide and conquer has been their method. Create situations setting one group against another to control and exploit both.

We are at a place in history where we can end this charade. We must not use their tactics to fight back. That only strengthens them and weakens us. We must see how pathetic they are. We can see their disguise. We may abhor their behavior but see the loving being at their core. Like Gandhi and King we can resist with all we have but return only love. They are helpless to fight love.

It may sound difficult but if we practice in our personal lives we will learn. If we stay in the moment and only choose loving responses, we find we can deal with the crabbiness in our family members. We find ourselves automatically forgiving the rude shopkeeper realizing he must be having a bad day and his rudeness is not personal. By having only loving responses in our own lives, we see paradise dawning in our family and surroundings. We begin to see how we can apply this knowledge to the World Stage.

We must continue to work on ourselves. We can do it. Love can't lose.

Love and Peace, Gregg

MOVING

Happy Monday. Another day on Planet Earth. We have Sunshine which makes it a great day. We have had much cloudiness the last six weeks. We are ready for Sunny weather. Kind of like the world situation. We are all ready for some light.

My daughter, Laura, wrote an excellent comment on my last blog [FB]. She suggested that my insomnia could have something to do with my leaving my home of 43 years and moving here which changed my lifestyle completely. Since my illness emerged as we were contemplating moving I did not have an opportunity to realize what it meant. I didn't delve into the feelings I might have and skated along on the surface. At the time I wondered how come it wasn't more wrenching.

I have had two great passions in my life; one was living close to Nature and living off the land, the other was raising my consciousness and aiding in the enlightenment.

When I first started blogging it was the first passion I meant to pursue. We had lived close to Nature, raising our own food, heating and cooking with wood, learning how to refrigerate with well water in the summer, lighting with candles and kerosene lamps etc. We stepped back a generation and had no electricity, we had a pump outside the kitchen door and an outhouse a ways away. We learned how to live elegantly and I look upon those years as very gratifying. I was on sabbatical [self created] for seven years. When I returned to full employment we gradually joined the modern society.

The back to the land movement seemed to be picking up again and my idea was to create a blog where a conversation could begin about modern homesteading as Jamie and I had so much experience we wanted to share. Perhaps I didn't give it a chance, we didn't get any questions or comments on the subject so I soon followed my other passion.

I never dreamed I would move from that property. I had meant to die there. I do not regret the move. I do wish I had been healthy and could process the event. It was clear we couldn't continue our lifestyle without help. Jamie had a severe dislocation of her shoulder that has taken a long time to heal. She could no longer garden as much as she wanted to and she couldn't stand to see the gardens go to weeds. I was plain and simply getting too old. I could take care of the chickens and sheep, but the overall maintenance became more than I could handle. It was time. A younger couple needed to take over. We were fortunate to sell to an ideal couple who love the place as much as we did.

I have been disabled two of these last three months. I only got out of my chair when I had to, now that I am recovering the significance of this move is impinging on my awareness. Don't get me wrong. I love our new house and it fits well for my life as it now is, I can devout my time to reading, studying and writing. I will find plenty of opportunities for good exercise. We are surrounded by parks and the river is in walking distance. We see swans and geese everyday. Nature's splendor is all around us.

Oh, I miss our own eggs. Those grocery store eggs may say organic, cage free or free range, but they are not real eggs in my book. Now that I am feeling better we will have to find a provider of real eggs. I know there are some Amish families in the area.

Yes, I need to spend some time grieving for what I feel I lost. Perhaps I need to cry. I need to bless my old life and step into my new life with full vigor and awareness.

I know everything is perfect. How could it be any other way?

Thank you, oh loving Universe!

Love and Peace, Gregg

LIFE'S ADVENTURES

We had an adventure last Night. It must have been a little after 9 PM that I felt the house was cooling down. I turned up the thermostat and checked the registers. There seemed to be heat coming from one of them, which was weird, but in about a half hour it was clear that the furnace shut down. The forecast was for 2 degrees above zero, that didn't bode well for our comfort. I looked up heating contractors in this area on the internet and saw two that were fairly close. It occurred to me to ask somebody who lived here for a recommendation. I did. They recommended one of those I had chosen. I called them. They had one call they were busy with but felt they would get here in an hour.

This house must be well insulated because the temperature dropped slowly. The thermostat was set at 73 and it was still 70ish when I called for help. But it reached a point where it dropped rapidly. I found a little electric heater we brought over from our old house and plugged it in in my study. I sat at my computer playing solitaire and waited. Was he coming? Did he get held up? Did I give him the wrong address?

The furnace repair man arrived about 11:30. He found a dirty flame sensor that was causing the system to shut down. He cleaned things up and checked everything and said the furnace is working fine. He explained to me what a flame sensor is but I didn't get it.

All and all it was a good adventure. I enjoyed meeting the repair man. I admire people who do that kind of work and it must be great to help people out. I looked at the furnace and it was a complete mystery to me. I replaced and relit pilot lights and even replaced fuel nozzles but these modern furnaces don't look anything like what I am familiar with. Of course it is 43 years since I lived in a house with a furnace. We heated with wood and then installed a ground source heat pump in the house we just moved from.

I mentioned before that somewhere a long the line of my recovery I developed insomnia. It was bad last Night. The last time I had bouts of insomnia I was in graduate school. It is kind of a graduate student disease. I think when I was in graduate school I just had trouble getting to sleep. With this insomnia I generally go to sleep okay and then wake up one hour later. I am wide awake. Attempting to get back to sleep causes agitation. It varies in intensity. Sometimes I go back to sleep after a little while and sometimes I get up for a while. I often just sleep in snatches of 45 minutes to an hour. There is a similar insomnia some folks have after drinking a few cocktails before bed but I am not drinking. This has been going on about two months.

I thought it was caused by unfaced fears of dieing or needing more treatment, but now that I have had a clear PET scan it should get better. I was always a little skeptical of that interpretation. I don't think I have a fear of dieing, at least not something that would keep me up at Night.

I believe there are no accidents and this insomnia is my creation but for the life of me I can't figure it out. I must be trying to teach myself something. Perhaps I am trying to teach myself that the answer lies within. Believe me I am looking within.

The sting of the insomnia melts away when I see how thankful I am. I have everything a person could possibly want and every so called problem turns out to be some kind of blessing. I knew the adventure with the furnace was going to be more than okay. I was never rattled by it even with the temperature outside plummeting. I got to meet another person who does magic with his hands. That was great.

I will keep looking inside and the insomnia episodes will turn out to be a blessing also.

HAPPY FRIDAY EVERYONE AND HAPPY NEW MOON!

Love and Peace, Gregg

A NEW LEASE

Wow! It is already 4:PM. Six members of our old gang came up and took us to lunch. We had a great lunch! We had great conversation and the restaurant was well above average. Jamie and I are going to visit that place again. It was only five minutes from our new home.

It was wonderful to reconnect with people and hear about those that were not present. It is also a little sad as we miss everybody. Then as one of the folks mentioned, everything is changing; many people are moving, some are in decline from age related health concerns and yes some are even dieing. At almost 84 I am perhaps the oldest of the group but none of us are youngsters.

Of course I had to have a nap upon returning home and that is why it is so late.

Now that I got a new lease of life I can look forward to all kinds of excitement. Just exploring the area around where I live will be an adventure. I wonder how many great restaurants are within a stone throw of our residence.

Of course my greatest passion is raising my consciousness to the point where I can only perceive the love that is endowed in everybody and everything and sharing that knowledge to help others to do the same.

I know I have a lot of company because the internet is full of information on the awakening. There are many teachers out there and we need them all. There is someone for everybody. We hold the truth inside us and we can recognize it by our feelings if a teaching fits us or not. When it is right for us we often have an 'aha' experience as if we are being reminded of something we already know. We need to learn to trust our intuition.

Most of us have been programmed to think with our brain/mind. It is a fine organ. It is excellent for solving some problems. It is not much use in understanding the purpose of life. It is good at unraveling 'doing' but falls on its face at understanding 'being'.

We can learn to think with our heart/mind. It takes practice. I am just learning. When the majority of our thoughts are loving we will begin to understand. It is difficult for folks to accept that their thoughts create their perception. I have been paying great attention to this phenomena in myself and I have no doubt about it. I can make an emerging situation pleasant or unpleasant merely because of my judgement.

I know that choosing the most loving interpretation of any event can be life changing. We think and evaluate and judge way too much. When we are doing this we are misusing our brain/mind, it is for solving problems of physical time and space it is incapable of judgement.

Judgement is actually foreign to both the brain/mind and heart/mind. Judgement is a product of ego. We created the ego to protect our fragile bodies in an an alien environment. Ego is not negative or positive but it is used negatively by the brain/mind whenever a nuance of fear is introduced. There is no limit to the destruction the ego can create in the presence of fear.

We are learning to trust our intuition. We can only do this by not inviting fear into our lives. Fear can be very subtle, it can distort the conclusions of our brain/mind and corrupt our intuition. The brain/mind can be very attracted to fear and that is scary, but love is such a powerful force for our heart/mind that it will takeover the major function of guiding our lives when we concentrate on having only loving thoughts.

It is almost 5PM I must get on to other things.

Thanks again for your positive energy that gives me this new lease on life!

Love and Peace, Gregg

A SPECIAL MESSAGE

The oncologist just called. No cancer anywhere in my body. He said the results of the scan couldn't be better.

Thank you for your good thoughts!

Love and Peace,  Gregg

WORKING ON SELF

I just awoke from a nap and I am still groggy. I had a doctor's appointment at the local clinic. I am transferring from Mora to here. It is too far to drive to Mora, especially in the Winter. In the past I rarely visited a doctor and traveling fifty miles or so would be no big deal, but since my affliction I have an appointment almost every week. I expect this to end soon. If my PET scan is clear I should be able to finish with these follow-up visits.

I haven't heard from my oncologist yet. His nurse said he always calls with the results as he knows folks are eager to hear. We are still waiting.

I have really needed to work on myself to keep negative thoughts from evading my mind. I could directly experience how thoughts create what we see in front of us. Negative thoughts quickly created a dark mood if I entertained them for any length of time. I could also experience the opposite. I could jolly myself out of a negative space by insisting on having only positive thoughts. I became a fan of that old axiom 'fake it until you make it'. If we act out feeling good we actually begin to feel good.

As I mentioned in my last blog. I am keeping myself out of the mental gutters. I am less apprehensive. I am sure the worse thing that could happen is they would recommend further treatment. Let us hope not as it has taken me two months to begin substantial recovery from the first batch of treatments. In any case I will let you folks know as soon as I hear anything.

You haven't heard me rant and rave about the outside world lately. Partly that is due to the focus on my own well being, but it also has to do with the meaninglessness of the games that are being played on the world stage. It is not worthy of comment. All the horror of separation is pictured on the electronic picture tubes that caste their pale blue shadow in our living rooms.

It is not the real world. It is an illusion within the larger illusion and it is utterly false. The peoples of the Earth want peace. They just want to live their lives. They want to love their spouses, eat their meals and kiss their children good night. They have no interest in being manipulated into hating people they have never met.

Even those who have never heard of the concept of Oneness are feeling it. They intuit it. They understand the destructiveness of divisiveness. They will no longer allow forces to separate them from there neighbors. They will no longer accept the demonization of those they have never met. The concept of Oneness is too powerful to resist.

There is a great awakening happening in the world. We can help. We can get with it and shine our light on everyone. It is easy, just begin by wishing everybody well and then let your heart be your guide. We really do love everybody.

Let us not permit the events of life dim our light. The world needs our light! Our spouses need our light! Our children need our light! Our families need our light! Our friends need our light! Everybody needs our light!

Love and Peace, Gregg